The roles and expectations characterizing the stressful lives of drinkers’ significant others are not to be understood by individual psychology alone, as cultural definitions of this social tie determine them as well. In this article an attempt is made to develop the necessary empirical basis for developing a non-biased and helpful understanding of the particular problem of being a significant other to a problem drinker. The empirical data collected from a self-recruited sample of close associates of heavy drinkers was analysed to describe the main dimensions of relating to a drinker. The differences between persons in different family roles were examined. The results show that the role of a care giver and helper is most clearly adopted by spouses. The children but also the spouses take action that protects them as autonomous individuals. The nuclear family seems to carry the main load, even if other relatives and friends have their roles as wel
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