It's not the voting that matters, Joseph Stalin once observed, but the counting. At the illegitimate referendum to be held in Crimea on March 16th, the Ka-lashnikov-wielding men in balaclavas and the absurdly skewed ballot paper may also play a role. Like Vladimir Putin's surreal claim that the elite troops who have overrun the peninsula are merely local volunteers, the referendum would be laughable, were it not-like Mr Putin's invasion-dreadfully real.
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