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'I'm reviewing (bedebede-bum), the situation (bedebede-bum)'

机译:“我正在审查(贝贝蒂流浪汉),情况(贝贝蒂流浪汉)”

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摘要

My precocious niece is anticipating a major increase in cash-based Christmas gifts this year. With Christmas approaching I have to confess that I struggle to catch the festive fever. I may have been immunised against it as a child, as part of an ill-remembered (probably criminal) experiment in the Good Old Days before all those ethics committees ruined science. I don't fear Christmas, for which the correct medical term is SantaClaus-trophobia; it just leaves me cold but not in a snowy, chocolate-box way. Not for me an advent calendar filled with cheap, palate-adhering chocolate and an early morning dip in my Stephan Curve. Nor the rush to find the perfect gift in the face of the countdown of shopping days to go. Indeed, now that petrol stations are open on Christmas morning, I feel none of the urgency that my colleagues express about seasonal shopping. And my mother always greets her unwrapped windscreen wiper blades with a loving smile, and a wistful comment that they will come in very useful if she ever gets a car.
机译:我早熟的侄女预计今年以现金为基础的圣诞节礼物会大量增加。随着圣诞节的临近,我不得不承认我为赶上节日的发烧而挣扎。在所有这些伦理委员会摧毁科学之前,我可能是在孩提时代就曾接受免疫接种的,这是旧时光记忆不良(可能是犯罪)实验的一部分。我不担心圣诞节,圣诞节的正确称呼是圣诞老人恐怖症。它只会让我感到寒冷,但不会像白雪皑皑的巧克力盒一样。对我而言,不是一个摆着日历的日历,里面充斥着廉价的,有味觉的巧克力和清晨的斯蒂芬曲线。面对购物天数的倒计时,也不必急于寻找完美的礼物。的确,既然加油站在圣诞节早晨开放,我感到我的同事没有季节性购物的紧迫感。我的母亲总是以充满爱意的笑容迎接她展开的挡风玻璃刮水器刮板,并恳切地评论说,如果她有汽车,刮刮器刮板将非常有用。

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